Creative Ways to Navigate the Holidays on Your Own...
By Ailene Gerhardt, MA, BCPA, Founder, Beacon Patient Solutions LLC and the Navigating Solo Network
Navigating the winter holiday season can be challenging for anyone. Despite the best of efforts, it is possible to find ourselves navigating the season on our own. Planning ahead is one of the best ways for solo agers to live a dynamic life. Enhancing our connections with others is always useful, especially as we approach the holiday season.
While many articles this time of year focus on navigating “family dynamics” and other complexities of the holiday season (especially while still navigating a pandemic), my lens is focused on unique needs of solo agers during this time.
As a solo aging advocate and educator, as well as an independent board certified patient advocate, I am always thinking about how isolation and loneliness can impact overall health and health outcomes.
Throughout this article I offer useful approaches for solo agers (and anyone else) to navigate the ups and downs of the holiday season.
Plan Ahead:
Planning is one of the best ways for solo agers to live a dynamic life. It involves intentional thought around an array of topics ranging from healthcare to housing to building/enhancing support systems to how one spends time and with whom!
It can be useful to decide in advance what you will eat, what kinds of activities you will do in your downtime, what TV show(s) or movie(s) you want to watch, music you would like to listen to, etc. Perhaps you have been meaning to curl up with a good book or magazine!
If you and your friends are up for a virtual visit, you could try doing an activity together, whether it’s a game, a craft project, or enjoy a meal.
Get creative with technology:
Using technology to connect with others is another way to stay connected! Schedule recurring virtual visits throughout the winter so you can connect with others.
If you have friends who can offer emotional and mental support, go ahead and schedule time with them, too. Create a list of friends and extended family members to call or video chat with over the holidays and set dates and times with them. Be direct about your need for distraction and to feel connected because you are feeling down about spending the holidays alone.
Remember, everyone is different and needs a varying amount of social contact, so find a routine that works best for you!
Connect with Others In Person:
Organizations in our communities offer a wide array of programming and opportunities to connect with others! Plan to attend programs offered by your local community center, senior center, library, or faith community.
Make a point of saying “hello” to a neighbor or neighbors.
Pick up the phone and call a friend you haven’t spoken to in a while, reaching out to people and strengthening bonds can help you feel more connected and less lonely.
Seek out connections with others who have similar interests and/or identify as solo agers. Create new traditions by joining with others you have chosen to be a part of your support network! The Navigating Solo Network connects people through virtual gatherings, facebook groups, and gathering interest in regional groups.
Make a point to find joy in small interactions. If you’re having a hard time coping with being alone for the holidays, connect with others around you. Reach out to people in your community. It doesn’t have to be a deep connection but putting in the effort for a friendly exchange can be enough to shift some feelings of loneliness. It’s these small moments of connection—even with people you wouldn’t expect—that can turn your whole day around.
Decorate Your Home:
It’s always nice to make the holiday season a multi-sensory experience. It's not just about eating your favorite foods, it's about the sounds of holiday music in the background and the special decorations we put up for the holidays. Includes decorations that make you smile.
Do Something for Yourself:
While it may not completely erase feelings of loneliness, taking special care of yourself can help you to feel better. Whether you curl up with a good book, enjoy a hobby, or learn something new, doing something for yourself is a form of self-care that is especially important during difficult times. Taking time to do things that will enhance your self-esteem or at least give you a good dose of fun will not only take your focus off feeling alone but can lift your spirits as well.
